This feeling sucks so much. I’m suffocating. There’s so many things I want to say and do but I just don’t know how. It’s funny how I was fine three minutes ago. Anyways… thinking always gets the best of me. Sometimes I wish I could just delete all the memories in my brain and begin with a clear head. Since I can’t, might as well ‘handle’ and smile. And since EVERYTHING eventually dies, I might as well start murdering things ahead of time because what’s the point in waiting until it dies by itself? I want to jump 20 years into the future. I want to know who’s strong enough to handle my bullshit. I want to see what will become of me. I want anything other than being here right now. Fuck.